Sarah-Beth

It's a new year, and I've decided to make good on my promise to update. Here's a bunch of what's been going on in my life:

I'll get the major news out of the way first. We met mom's new oncologist, Dr. Ellis, who is enrolling mom in a chemo trial. This means that she's going to be closely monitored as they compare the effectiveness of a commonly used and itravenously-administered chemo drug against a new type of drug that's given through a daily pill. This doc was also very honest with us. Mom will not beat cancer. She will eventually die from this disease. What we still don't know is how long she has. This chemo should help to beat off the cancer that has taken hold in her liver - and who knows where else it's spread to. But that's the beauty of chemo - it attacks cancer in nearly every part of the body. The catch is, it doesn't act very effectively against brain cancer. I'm still struggling with this reality very much. In fact, I'm going to start counselling soon to help me cope. It's getting harder and harder for me to put on a happy face and care for mom and be here for dad. In fact, I've been running away an awful lot lately - I try to find any possible excuse to leave the house because it is not a happy place for me. In fact, Ryan's apartment feels more like home lately, because it is a place that I can escape to when I need it. I am very thankful that I have such a place. However, I also have to learn to cope so that I can be here for Dad. This situation is finally catching up with him, especially with all the extra time he's had to take away from work to be with mom for appointments and treatments lately. He is finding it very difficult to cope, and not having me around is not helping at all. So, I am trying the best I can to be here for him. Besides - I miss my Dad. A whole lot. I'm hoping that counselling will help me to deal with all the conflicting emotions I have throughout this struggle.

With all the struggle that my family has been facing this year, I still managed to do ok in school. My biggest source of pride is my Learning Objects class. My group worked so well together that we managed to put together a wonderful project and achieved an AMAZING mark in the class. I was also very happy with my Info Design class. My group wrote a great technical manual and I earned an 86 in that course.

My Digital Journalism course was a huge source of frustration for me. My group members had increasingly poor work ethic and no technical skill to offer, so I was stuck doing nearly all of the work on our project. I even left the classroom in tears one day after fighting with one group member because he did not complete any of the material that he was supposed to produce for our project. Instead, he submitted poorly written work that in no way adhered to the style of project that our group had agreed upon. And he had the gull to argue with me about this after my Week from Hell, where I had to take a week off for mom's surgery and uncle bob's funeral. In the end, he didn't complete the work. The major project consisted of an online journalism project - a website featuring articles on environmentalism and some interactive games. I did all of the design work for the website, which totalled more than 120 hours of website creation. I am incredibly proud of what I produced, but I'm not very pleased that all of my literal sweat and tears amounted to only a mark of 86. Given the amount of dedication I'd put into this course, on principle I think I deserve something higher.

My Rhetoric class is where I really dropped the ball. I decided not to attend the lectures because the prof was teaching the exact material from the prerequisite course. I felt it was a waste of my time. Before I stopped attending, I gave what I thought was a pretty good Conference Paper (i.e. we had to write a short essay to read in front of the class) but I didn't do many of the short reading-responses that were due for each of the lecture readings as part of the Participation Mark. I must've written a pretty good essay because I still managed a 70 in the class even tho I missed out on the 20% participation mark. Still, I'm frustrated because I know I would've kicked some butt in that class if I hadn't been frustrated by the prof's laziness and stopped attending. Still, it'll serve as motivation so that I don't slack off in any of my remaining two terms.

Canadian Literature is a class I'll always look back on with mixed feelings. I really enjoyed a lot of the works we studied, but I didn't take the time to read all of them. As a result, I felt lost and muddled throughout much of the term, and I certainly felt lost on the final exam. My stress was compounded when, after my exam, the prof told me that I'd flunked my final essay. Actually, I got a 60% on the paper, but in my eyes that is utter and complete failure. I've never - even during that gray period known as my grade 11 experimental year - done so horribly on an English essay. In her infinite he prof offered to let me rework the paper an resubmit it. Still, I left that exam feeling entirely defeated. That exam was supposed to mark the end of this tumultuous term, which I wanted so desperately to be over. Instead, I had the fucking essay hanging over my head. I balled. I called Ryan to pick me up from school (he had my car so that I wouldn't have to pay for parking while on campus) and I balled until he got there. Then I balled even harder when I got in the car with a very confused and concerned Ryan. I got myself under control on the drive home and then when we got to his apartment I balled some more. Thank goodness Ryan is so understanding - he was very patient and let me cry and get it all out of my system. When it was all over, I went home and went to sleep. The next day I told my dad - and cried some more. I was so upset about disappointing him and myself with my poor performace. But - of course - Dad didn't care. He told me that it didn't matter about the grade. And he encouraged me to tackle the essay and prove to myself that I could earn the mark I deserved. That night I reread my essay and followed the prof's advice on how to fix it. See, it was a good essay in that it compared two novels from the course on the similar themes they shared. But what I needed to do was use a specific type of literary criticism to frame the essay. So, I sent the prof an email with a detailed outline of how I planned to add this element to my essay. The next day - very much to my surprise - she called me. She told me that she'd marked my exam and that I had an ok mark in the course, but it was lower than what she thought I deserved. So she gave me three options - keep the mark I had, rewrite the essay, or come to her office to chat about literary criticism as a sort of oral exam to prove that I understood that very important facet of the course. I asked if I could think about my options, and then get back to her. Then I asked if she'd read the email I'd sent to see if my essay outline seemed ok if I chose to take the option of rewriting it. She told me that she hadn't read the email yet, but that she'd get back to me about it and asked me to get back to her when I came to my decision about what route I wanted to take for my final grade. A couple of hours later I received a reply to my email. She said that the outline I'd sent her contained enough detail that it proved to her I did understand the literary criticism that she taught in the course. She told me that this email was all she needed to give me a grade of 85 in the class. So in one email, I had that huge burden lifted off my shoulders. I was free of that class, and I got an awesome mark. I said that I'll always look back on the class with mixed feelings - I am eternally greatful that the prof gave me the opportunity to rewrite my essay, and that she was even more lenient in the end by freeing me from having to do even that. And I don't feel like I was handed that mark on a silver platter, because I know I always put a particular effort into the lectures by reading poetry out loud (I was always the first person the prof called on to read for her, and I never said no) and I always participated in class discussions, even if I hadn't read the novel or poem. So I know that I did deserve some credit for that, and I'm sure that her generosity towards me was in part because of that. But I'm also always going to let that mark of 60% stay in the front of my mind when I want to slack off in the future. English is what I do. I will never fail myself like that again.

So in that end, school turned out ok. It was a really difficult semester for me, but I am incredibly proud that I came out of it so strongly.

The weekend right after school ended was a busy one. Jenn and Kelsie came back from Italy for Xmas, so we met them downtown for drinks at the Albion. It was really nice to see them, and to hear a bit about thier lives in Florence. But it was even better to be a spectator watching Ryan interacting with his best pals. I love it when those guys get together, because you can tell how much they value thier friendships with one another. That's all I'm going to say about that, cuz I don't want to embarress those boys.

Saturday was Vanessa's birthday party. She and I went shopping on Thursday for martini glasses, food and booze, and on Saturday I went to her place early to help set things up for the festivities. It was a simple and wonderful little kitchen party. Nessa and I chopped fruit for the fondue (ok... Nessa chopped fruit - I butchered it! I was so inept in the kitchen that evening, but somehow I managed to leave with all my appendeges intact!) Ange, Davey, Eric, Dustin and his girlfriend, Nessa, Dane and I (with brief visits by both of Nessa's younger sisters and her parents) sat around the kitchen just chatting and drinking a lot of alcohol. I never felt drunk that night, tho I did drink a whole lot of yummy-tasting liquor. (Ask me to make you a Sweet-Tart Martini - they're my speciality!) We ended the evening with a rousing game of Who Wants to be a Millionaire. It was boys against girls. Can you guess who won???

The next day was the First Annual Doner-Bianchi Xmas Party. Nearly everyone that I invited ended up coming, so it was a full house! It was really nice to see Bob after so long, and he brought a freind. Ashly, Adam, Caleb and Andie came out and stayed right to the very end of the party!! I was so happy to see them, and so glad that they could stay for the whole party!!! Kim brought her new friend from work, Alan. I imagine we'll be seeing more of him, and I'm glad, cuz he's a good fit with out rag-tag bunch of geeks. There were tonnes of people, so I'm not going to mention them all. But I was really pleased to see that everyone seemed to enjoy themselves, and that the Bianchi and Doner groups of friends all merged so well. Oh. And did I mention the food??? Yum! The potluck went really well, and there was an awesome variety of viddles to be had by all. Mmmm-mmm! I can't wait for next year's party just for the food!

Oh. I have a lesson for everyone on karma. See, Dad and I went to CostCo to get supplies for the party and for the Xmas holidays. While there, we decided that Once and For All, we would have matching utensils, so we bought a really nice Lagostina Flatware service for 10. Well, being the feather-brains that we are, we left the flatware in our cart and didn't realize it the next day. What a waste of $70, right? Wrong! I called CostCo and someone turned in our flatware!!! I scooted back to CostCo, membership card and receipt in hand, and they turned over the shiney matching forks and knives to me! So, to the awesome person who had the decency to turn in the flatware instead of keeping it for yourself: you rock. Good things will doubtless come thier way, cuz that's karma!

Ok. So that's half of what I needed to cover. Now I'm really tired. But I promise that I'll take some time tomorrow to finish the tales of my holidays. For now, I need to read a bit and then hit the sack.

This is a constant refrain from my loyal readers. At their request, here's a list of things that I should post about soon:

* Ryan's family Xmas
* Latest mom news - she's doing more chemo
* Albion for Kelsie & Jen's return
* Vanessa's party
* School update - DAC project from hell that I am really proud of; Learning Objects project that earned me a 95% in the class... but I still have a bit more work to do on it; rhetoric class sucks; Info Design project that is done and I'm fairly happy with; Canadian Lit class that was a big stressor for me... until today!
* I am so madly in love with Ryan...
* Christmas is coming - shopping, baking, wrapping and more!
* The Doner-Bianchi Xmas party is TOMORROW!!!!
* CostCo karma lesson
* Shadow has reflux
* I miss reading for pleasure so much!
* Gearing up for camping - literally!

Ok. That's all I'll commit myself to for now. I dunno when I'll get a chance to fill in the blanks, but it'll be sometime before Christmas.

EDIT: I forgot to include the Caribou show on my list!!!!

This is a belated entry, actually. You see, mom was released from the hospital the DAY AFTER her brain surgery! How amazing is that?!?!?!?

Mom's doing really well. She's been resting a lot, which is key to recouperating. The doc is tapering off her dose of Decadron, the hard-core steroid that they put people on to keep the swelling down around tumours like her brain tumour. We're looking forward to her getting off the drug, cuz our grocery bill is HUGE as the main side-effect of the drug is a voracious appetite.

Ryan and I made the trip to Wasaga to attend Uncle Bob's funeral yesterday. It was a really pleasant service, with at least 200 guests in attendance. He was incredibly religious, so the service was very religious. The best part about the service was the laughter. People told stories about him, and his daughter Rebekah gave a really wonderful speech to introduce the slideshow she put together. It was really comforting to hear his wife (my aunt Lorraine) and daughter laughing the loudest throughout the service.

Afterwards we went back to their house for a quiet family get together. It was a way for the Barrett family to spend some time with Bek and Lorraine away from all the other guests. It was a really pleasant time and I'm glad that we went.

The drive back was good, as Ryan was the one at the wheel. We had great conversation on the way back, discussing religion and our feelings towards it. We seem to be on the same page there, which is good.

When we got to Guelph we made a quick stop in to see Ryan's parents. I filled them in on my mom's situation and they got to see that Ryan truly does exist as more than a distant voice on the phone or text in an email. We'll be seeing them again on the weekend at his cousin's confirmation.

So it's back to the grind for me. It feels a little weird to be going back to school after this week away. But it was sooooo necessary. I needed the time to spend with mom at the hospital, but I also needed the down time that the additional days off provided. I'm actually looking forward to returning to the grind and putting this term to bed. Can't wait to be done and on to new things in the new year!

Speaking of better things... I signed and submitted my contract and various other documents to RIM today! I can't wait to start co-op next term!!!

Today my mom had her brain tumour removed for the second time. The surgeon assures us that he got the entire tumour this time. Mom is now totally alert and back to her sarcastic, witty self.

Keep praying for us and thinking good thoughts. The battle isn't over, but this is still a huge victory for us.

Here's a brief recap of my life over the past while...

• On Thursday night, a group of folks got involved in a Guerilla Art installation. What an awesome experience.


• On Friday Ryan, Kevin and I made our way to Timmins. We left from the Guelph/Waterloo area and made our way into Toronto to tie up some loose ends for Kevin.


• Before leaving Toronto I got a triumphant call from my mom informing me that her surgery has finally been booked. She'll check into the hospital on Tuesday to have her brain tumour removed on Wednesday. So, it's off to Hamilton for my mom, Dad and I this week.


• We then hopped on the highway and headed North. We followed Highway 11 and hopped off occasionally for the purpose of exploration. We picked up a map for Ryan's wall (which also came in handy for navigation - who knew?) at an Info Centre in Barrie.


• While Kevin slept in the back seat, Ryan and I played a word game to stay awake and feed the friendly competetive spirit that we share. We played the "say a word, the other person says a word starting with the last letter, and so on" game. For the record, I won at Boys Names, and we tied on Girls Names. It was hilarious to hear Ryan speaking in Stream-of-Consciousness, as this is something my contemplative counterpart seldom engages in. And we discovered that lots of Boys Names end in N, while Girls Names tend to end in vowels.


• Somewhere along the way my Dad called to let me know that Shadow appeared to be having a seizure and that he was headed home to deal with it. He and mom called the Vet to make an appointment. It seems that Shadow started shaking and lost the use of her back legs for about 15 minutes. I wasn't particularly worried, because I knew a seizure was something that could likely be controlled with pills. It was just a matter of getting her to the vet and dealing with it. I actually said to my Dad as he assured me not to worry "If I can handle brain cancer in my mom, I can certainly handle epilepsy in my dog." Funny how you gain a whole new perspective and a means to deal with things, eh?


• We stopped in Bracebridge to get another decorative map, but the Info Booth there was all out. Since we were already there, we decided to grab a coffee at a little place downtown. Ryan got a coffee while Kev and I opted for the fancier Mocha and Butter Tart combo. The Mochas were made with espresso, steamed cream, chocolate shavings and chocolate sauce. Damn they were good! They were coffee with the smooth taste of chocolate, rather than the sweet and icky things that pass as mochas in other places. The butter tart was runny as hell and super rich. It was death by yummy consumables. One cool thing to note is that the coffee shop has autographed photos of famous people on the walls. These include Red Green (I can't remember his real name right now) and Mike Myers.


• On the road again, we began to notice an accumulation of snow as we continued North. At first it was just in the shady parts of the ditches, then Kev and I saw a water-and-ice-fall cascading down a cliff just outside of North Bay.


• Apparently I mentioned that my grandma grew up in Cobalt a bunch of times, and there were quite a few billboards along the highway advertising the Cobalt Mine Tour, so we decided to explore a bit. We got off Highway 11 and drove through Cobalt and North Cobalt. The guys remarked on the condition of the town with its obviously hastily built and also hastily abandoned houses lining the highway... That got me even more excited about them seeing Timmins, as it is a town currently in decline, tho on a larger scale than Cobalt. We stopped in Haileybury to grab refreshments, and decided to take a walk by Lake Timiskaming. I took photos of the boys as they stood by the lake, with Kevin explaining artistic principals to Ryan. It was a really powerful moment.


• By the time we got back on the road, it was fairly dark. We continued our sightseeing as we headed toward our final destination. The most significant sight that we took in was the sudden change in snow conditions. It seemed a very abrupt shift from areas with light accumulation, to Timmins, with its thick powder and waist-high banks.


• As we entered the city through Porcupine, I started the tour. I pointed out the Falconbrige Met. Site, the government building where I wrote my G1 license test, the Porcupine Mall... After a much-needed pee break at the Tim Hortons in Porcupine, I took the wheel and gave the grand tour of South End. I showed them my old highschool, the downtown area, my old home, the airport, lakefront at Porcupine Lake, and the Barn arena.


• After the tour of South End, we headed into Timmins proper, with me pointing out things like the South End Cemetary where Grandpa Doner is buried, and the park-cum-tailings-pond outside of Schumacher.


• We thought we were ending our journey when we arrived at my cousin Darlene's, which is where we were staying for the weekend. We were wrong. I had forgotten to call Dar to remind her of our arrival, and she had forgotten about me. Ooops. She was at her daughter's ringette game, so we faced a locked door on an empty house. I preferred to pass the time in warmth, so we headed over to Uncle Bill & Aunty Mar's house for a little visit. We drank some pop and chatted with them for a while before heading back to Dar's.


• Once again faced with a locked door, we decided to knock on Chad's door to see if he had a key to Dar's house. He lives in a small house behind Dar's, on her property. So, I knocked and he invited us in to hang out and meet the baby that he and Wendy just brought into the world a month earlier. She let me hold the baby and feed little Lillian a bottle, so I was in 7th Heaven. Ryan and Kev oogled over her a bit, and then turned their attention to Chad's pet Tarantulas. The female is about 4 inches across, and the male is about 6 inches across. I'm probably off in my estimates because I stayed well back and coddled the baby, so you can ask Ryan and Kev for details.


• Dar eventually came home and stopped in at Chad's and we stayed for a while longer before heading to her place for the night. She set us up quite nicely in her basement, with Ryan and I on the futon covered by 4 very comfy blankets, and Kev in my cousin Ben's bed. Ben is away at school in Ottawa, so we had his basement bedroom as our homebase for the weekend.


• The next morning we woke up after a long and much-needed sleep. We made a career out of having showers and getting prepared for the day. At around noon we headed to downtown Timmins for a little bit of sightseeing and then breakfast at Nadeau's. The tiny French-Canadian diner has a sizable breakfast menu which included eggs and homemade baked beans for Ryan, a crepes and eggs combo for Kev, and an omlette for me. Plus, they served decent non-pretentious coffee. All-in-all, a satisfying meal and a great start to our day.


• Upon leaving Nadeau's we made the decision to go to Kapuskasing as an afternoon road trip. I know what you're thinking - Why Kap? Well, Ryan wanted to see Ontario's northmost road-accessible city. Boasting a population of 9 500 people, Kap holds that distinction. Who knew? So off we headed on a 300km round-trip.


• On the way to Kap we took photos of a snowplow-train as it cleared the railway that runs along the side of the highway. I learned that it is very difficult to keep pace with a rather slow-moving train while trying to keep the car safely on the road.


• Along the way we stopped to see the spaceship in Moonbeam. Yes, you read that right. There's a little town called Moonbeam along Highway 11, about 20kms before Kap. The city's major attraction is the 12-foot high fibreglass flying saucer that sits outside the local Info Centre. I have photos of Kev and Ryan sitting on top of the flyng saucer, as well as a shot of them standing in front of it in their "tourist pose".


• We reached Kap in good time, and stopped to take photos of Ryan and Kevin climbing on more stuff. Ryan chose to lie prone beneath the rather large statue of a bear that is Kap's major attraction. Kevin made it his mission to mount the bear, which he did after much effort. I also have photos of Kev and Ryan standing atop a very large stone Kapuskasing sign.


• After a quick stop for coffee and a photo of the large decorative monument outside the very attractive Kap train station, we headed back to Timmins. We returned to Dar's place to find it empty (actually, Steph was home, but we didn't know it at the time) and the door unlocked. We let ourselves in and watched a movie until she and my cousin Corinna came in.


• When Dar and Corinna got home, they let me know that my Aunt Debbie was in the hospital. She is severely diabetic, and her sugar levels went very seriously out of control (for those who speak diabetes - he sugar was over 70!!!!) after a three-day bought with the flu. She was brought to hospital by ambulance by her son Kyle where she was admitted to the ICU. She's doing ok now, but the doctor's made it clear that Kyle was lucky he brought her in when he did.


• Despite the bad news about Debbie, we all enjoyed ourselves at the Wedding/Baby shower for my cousin Ryan and his new wife Jen over at Bill & Mar's place. We played cards with Steph and Chad's step-son Steven. We ate good food, visited with my relatives, and enjoyed the celebratory atmosphere. The highlight of the night was the DVD slideshow put together by a friend of Ryan & Jen's. It included a montage of Jen as a little girl and growing up, a similar sort of montage of Ryan, and then a montage of photos from throughout their relationship. It was a really touching presentation. Right afterwards, Jen and Ryan opened all of their gifts. I got to help by handing the gifts to Jen. She opened them, Ryan read the cards, and Dar & Aunt Vicky helped record who gave them what. It was a nice system, and they got some nice presents, many of them baby-oriented and thus inspiring a lot of Ooos and Ahhhs. It was a nice close to the evening.


• We went back to Dar's where Steph and I proceeded to kick the stuffing out of the boys at a game of Signal. Their signal was ingenious, but they lacked any skill at actually colleting the 4 of a kind necessary to actually use the signal. Steph and I played a subtle and straighforward strategy and beat them by approximately 30 to 3.


• Steph headed to bed, and we went to our basement hideaway to watch the rest of The Emperor's New Groove before getting some sleep.


• The next morning I got a call from my mom informing me that my Uncle Bob passed away. It was not a shocking revelation, as a few days previously he had decided to stop battling the cancer that he had been suffering from for over a year. I was actually quite relieved to know that he did not have to wait long to get his release from the disease. The memorial celebration of his life will be held on Sunday near his home. I'll be attending on behalf of my family, because Mom will likely still be in the hospital in Hamilton.


• We waited until Uncle Doug and Aunty Vicky arrived with a CD of photos from Brenna's wedding before finally heading home. We made a quick stop at the Earlton Zoo so that I could point out the giant anatomically-correct buffalo and so that Ryan could take over the driving.


• Our next stop was at Thornlowe Cheese factory where I picked up some cheese curds and a large block of cheddar for my Dad. We also stopped to explore the Highway Bookshop where Kev purchased a book on speech and human communications.


• Our only other stops were for peeing as we made a steady line for home. Still, it took us quite a bit longer than my dad expected, which irked him a bit. Still, he had to admit that he was glad we weren't rushing and driving like idiots, so he couldn't be made.


• We pulled into Waterloo around 9pm. The boys unloaded, and I said goodbye to Ryan before heading home.


• Today I got the details about Uncle Bob's funeral. I excused myself from all my lectures this week so that I can be ready to go to my cousin Rebekkah's side if she needs comfort or assistance while preparing for her father's funeral. The great thing is that her boyfriend was already out visiting her at school (she goes to Dalhousie for Nursing) so he was by her side when her father passed away. Bek and I spoke when mom and I visited this summer, and she tells me that her boyfriend is truly her soul mate. I'm really thankful that he could be there with her. As much as it is a relief to know that her father is no longer suffering, I'm sure she is still filled with all kinds of emotions.


• My mom got a call today from her cousin Ida in Thunder Bay. Her mother Hazel fell and broke her hip last week, and had it replaced today. Ida's daughter was also just released from hospital because she is battling some issues related to depression. Rachelle and I are fairly close and she was planning to move to Waterloo to come to school at UW. I sincerely hope she can still make it here next fall, because I'm sure the change of scenery and lifestyle will do her a world of good. On top of that, my mom's and Ida's cousin Dorothy died after a long battle with Multiple Sclerosis. Our family is going through a lot lately. Wow.

So that's it in a rather HUGEMUNGOUS nutshell. I didn't mean for this entry to go on so long, but there it is.

How am I doing through all this? Great, actually. The trip to Timmins was a great escape. I got some R & R and some quality time with Ryan, and with Kevin and my family. It's rejuvenated me for what's to come. I'm really looking forward to mom's surgery, I'm at peace with my uncle's death, and I will deal with everything else as it becomes necessary to do so.

Water is a refuge for me. I've come to realize this over the past few days. When I felt ill last weekend, I hopped in the shower and then later that night into a warm tub to make me feel better. Instead of hopping directly into bed to sink into an exhausted sleep, I've opted for the calm and contemplative zone of my bathtub. My morning showers are long. Too long when it's not my hot water bill. But water is where I'm finding a moment to think and to relax without the bothersomeness of the dry world.

I'm moving back and forth between feeling overwhelmed and feeling strong. I'm drifting, which is much better than abrupt and exhausting shifts between these two opposites.

Part of the reason I'm overwhelmed is definitely my fault. I've been somewhat lax this term. I opted for several weekends of social time instead of homework. Now it's catching up to me. But I'm glad I took the time to have some downtime and social time. It's something that I truly missed while up North for the summer. Now I must strike a balance so the one does not overtake the other ever again.

I'm also overwhelmed because I'm finally being challenged in some of my classes. These challenges are both enticing and frustrating for the same reasons. They all will be rewarding. But at first they were too daunting and I had too many balls in the air. Now I have a path, goals, a Plan of Attack.

The other part of my being overwhelmed is far beyond my control: Mom. Again, I've been running, hiding behind school and hiding away in Waterloo. This time I have been productive in my hiding, attacking the mountain of the semester, the summit of which I will soon reach. But all the while mom has been living out her illness. It is growing. She is... I don't want to write deteriorating because that is too callous, too close to the worst-case. No, I will say she is faltering. Her condition is drifting from being strong and steady to being tired and unsteady. She has trouble on the stairs. She has long naps and takes the Lorazapan to calm her nerves twice a day.

Today the Homecare nurse saved the day and ruined it in one fell swoop. She got the Truth. The surgeon is not doing his job. He hasn't booked the surgery. He's out of town with no word about mom and what she's supposed to do with the tumour trapped in her skull. He said "Two Weeks to a Month, tops." It has been five. It will be at least one more because there is no booking yet. So with this truth the nurse ruined everything by proving once again what a letdown the healthcare system is. Ha! "letdown" is too nice a word. All words are too nice to describe the reality:

They are killing her.


But the nurse also saved the day. Now we will stop waiting foolishly for them. Now we will look in London, Toronto, even Sudbury. Mom will get her surgery. Knowing that - and making that happen - makes me strong.

OMFG!!!! Seven very lucky members of the Waterloo Space Society (myself included, of course!) just met with Marc Garneau, president of the Canadian Space Agency and the first Canadian to go to space. And... I got his business card out of the deal!!! He gave it to me so that the WSS can contact him about getting more involved in the CSA.

So it's official! I work for RIM!

I got the unofficial word through my friend Alyssa who works at RIM and pestered the manager on my behalf. Two days later (this past Friday) I got the official Early Match notice from co-op.

So, as of next term, I will have a RIM job. (I had to say it just once!)

Hurray for me! I'm super pumped!

I alluded to this in the post I just wrote, but I'll go into more detail.

I went to my O-T interview on Friday with a certain amount of confidence, especially given the stellar response I got in my R** interview the day before. So I walked into the interview and the employer and I started chatting about how hectic it is to move offices. O-T is currently moving to their shiney new building in the UW Research & Technology Park, and S* did that during my last term there, so I feel their pain. Moving offices is HECTIC (right Lexx?)!! Anyways, after chatting and getting settled in, the interviewer cut to the chase. She told me that when she interviewed me previously (in my 2a term, the one that I ended up working at Sybase) she knew that I would be good for the job. (She hired my friend Katie instead, but I have no hard feelings because I'm sure Katie and I were similarly qualified at the time.) She said that obviously I'd developed an even greater skillset, so she was totally confident that I could handle the job. We went on to talk about S*'s writing system and editing process and about how I loved the usability project at Sybase. Then she told me that she was going to be totally honest with me. She said that, while it was unfair to the other 3 candidates interviewing for the job, the two people that she was really considering for the job were Katie and I. (Katie reapplied as a fallback in case she didn't like the other jobs she got interviews for.) She said that Katie and I were "known entities" and that she knew we were both totally up to snuff for the position. Then she said she'd call me on Monday to follow up and let me know "how I did" in the interview. (i.e. whether or not I got the job, but she's not really allowed to say that in so many words.)

Holy ego-stroke, Batman!!!

I left the interview with a swollen head from all the compliments. It's really rewarding to know that people respect me for what I've been working so hard to acheive. I joined the STC because I love technical communication. I worked hard at S* (well, as hard as I could given the circumstances) and I work hard at school and in the clubs and things I'm involved in. It's so nice that people recognize all that!

Even tho it was a big ego-stroke, I still felt a little bit of pressure to accept the position. Still, after getting feedback from several people in the co-op system and not in co-op, I've come to realize that I have to look at my own best interest. Employers understand that students need to make the best decisions for their own career and that if they look like a great candidate for their company, it's pretty damned likely that another company will feel the same way. So there it is. No more pressure.

(I still feel pretty cool about getting all these compliments this past week, tho!)

So I did it. There's no going back. It has been done.

(Ok, there is going back if I really want to, but meh. It's pretty much done, tho.)

I just made the bold decision to try and achieve an Early Match for the job I interviewed for this afternoon. The job is Documentation Services Assistant, and it sounds super-awesome! The interveiw went well, and it just so happens that the manager knows and respects my friend Alyssa, so I get cred for knowing her and because she's been talking me up around the office. Oh, and did I mention that it's at RIM?

For those unfamiliar with the ever-evolving co-op system (i.e. my aunts and possibly Ryan's mom) at UW, I'll explain:

Each school term, students who need co-op jobs apply for them through UW's online system called JobMine. We upload an HTML resume and search through job postings in the online database. When we apply for jobs, the JobMine system automatically attaches our co-op record of employment, our HTML resume, and a transcript of our UW grades. Employers sift through the applications and submit a list of students that they want to interview. Students see these interveiws online and choose an interveiw timeslot from the schedule outlined by the employer. Interviews occur over a period of about 3 weeks followed by Ranking Day. On Ranking Day, students log on to JobMine to see a list of the employers they've interviewed with. If an employer has ranked you as their number One choice you see the word Offer next to that company's name. If they don't want you at all, you see the words Not Ranked. If they want you but you're not their first choice, you simply see Ranked. If you have an Offer that you want to accept, you put the number One next to that company's name. If you don't have an Offer, you put the number One next to the jobs you were Ranked for and hope for the best. The only way you'll get a job you were Ranked for is if the person who was Offered the job doesn't accept it. (Tho if you're like me last term and get 6 Offers, you make this dream come true for 5 people! :oP ) You are not allowed to be stupid and rank a job if you were Not Ranked by the employer.

This term, co-op has decided to try something new and exciting. If you know you definitely want a job, you can rank it number One right away. As soon as the employer submits their rankings (and they're encouraged to submit them ASAP with this new system) if you have a One-to-One match - meaning they gave you an Offer and you ranked the job as number One - then you get that job right away! They check the latest matches every weekday morning and inform both employer and student of any matches by Noon. Once you're matched, you don't attend any of your remaining interviews and your interview spot is given to students on a waiting list.

I have decided that I REALLY want the Documentation Services Specialist job, so I just ranked it as number One.

I did have some trepidation about this decision. I kind of feel like I'll be letting down some employers who've already expressed an interest in hiring me. And I was kind of worried that I'd miss out on a good job if I don't give them a fair shake at an interview. But I know that I really want this job and that it's got more of what I'm looking for than any of the other positions I've applied for. And if I do get pulled from some interviews, it just gives someone else a crack at it! And this way I don't have to lead on any other employers by expressing interest in the interview while knowing full-well that I really want this job that RIM is offering.

(Plus, I'll get to work with my friend Alyssa next term, which is a really awesome bonus.) :o)

The RIM interview went well. The interviewer told me in a semi-direct round-about way that I have a 2 in 3 chance of getting the job. I like them odds!

Tomorrow is my Open Text interview. Hoo-rah!

Thursday the 13th @ 2:30pm - RIM - Process Documentation Specialist
Friday the 14th @ 1pm - Open Text - Technical Writer
Monday the 17th @ 8:30am (!!!) - NCR - Marketing Communications Analyst
Monday the 17th @ 2pm - RIM - Documentation Services Specialist
Tuesday the 18th @ 8:30am (!!!) - NCR - Technical Writer

It's been a good day for Yes...

Here's the scenario:

I parked on a side street across from Renison College for my night class. After class, I hopped in my car and drove to Needles Hall to park my car while I ran up the Comfy to say a quick hello to Ryan. I stayed for a little longer than anticipated because he didn't get there until after I arrived, and because I wanted to stick around and see him and the other guys in D20 action. I left the Comfy around 9:20pm and headed towards my car. That's when I saw him... He was a tall, hideous stranger. He veiled himself under a cloak of black nano-fabric to hide his festering, wounded skin. In his seething, skeletal hand he clutched a Device. An evil Device. I recognized him as a Ticketer - the lowliest of lifeforms that infest the compound that we call Campus. His motive was clear, but I had a trick up my sleeve - literally! I withdrew my hands from their den of comfort within my grey cotton cuffs and pressed the button... My car started, as did the Ticketer. He fled, horrified that the light from my steed Marvin would reveal his hidousness, which was no longer concealed by the comforting blanket of night...

The moral of the story - Thank goodness for Remote Starters!!!

Things that made me happy:

• Getting an interview with Open Text. That puts the count at one yes, one no, eight unknown.


• Enjoying an excellent dinner with friends. On Lexx. (Seriously Lexx, your generosity is astounding. I promise to return the favour next term when I have money.)


• Watching the Leafs beat the Flyers 4-2 with Telqvist in net. Glad they gave Eddie a break and laid on some steam.


• Looking forward to dinner chez Victoria tomorrow. Yeah to Victoria-styled food and conversation!


• Lunch with Kim on Friday (immediately before my interview with Open Text) which is long-overdue girly time for us.


• Mom feeling back to normal, but CCAC lining up weekly nurse visits (starting tomorrow!) to help us keep an eye on her. And I have nothing but good things to say about our case manager - she's got an awesome personality for this job!


• Watching the National curled up on the couch with Ryan.


• Shopping! My trappings include yummy fresh olives (a new addiction I blame on Andrea) and the materials for my Halloween costume.


• The longest and most convuluted Settlers game I've played to date.

I know my last post was incredibly emo, and I'm sorry if it shocked and worried everyone. But, I was shocked and worried myself. Still am, really.

I have been very introspective and contemplative and weepy for a few days. But I've figured some things out now.

First and foremost, I was reminded of how many people really and truly care about me. After writing that post, I crawled into Ryan's arms and cried for a while. That felt really good - both the crying and the having somebody to cry on. That night Lexx asked if I was doing ok and that made me cry, too. (Luckily it was dark and nobody had to know...) Every comment in response to my post made me cry. Kim's email and call made me cry. And thinking about Ashly and Vanessa and all my other friends who I know I can turn to made me cry. Hell - I'm crying right now.. But that's exactly what I need!!! I need for it to be ok to cry about this. I've had to be strong for my mom and also for my brother all thru this odessey. I couldn't cry because they needed somebody to tell them that this is all going to be ok. Now it's my turn to have people be strong for me, and it feels good to be surrounded by shoulders that are just waiting to be cried on.

The other thing I was reminded of is that I need to keep taking things one day at a time. I finally broke down and talked to my Dad about my concerns - mom possibly not being able to do chemo again, how we're going to get Brad here so that he can see her, that I really want to move out after I graduate but right now I feel trapped because I don't want to abandon mom and him... He put it in perspective for me - I had a fun day planned on Saturday, dinner with my family on Sunday, a day to do homework and see a Buster Keaton matinee on Monday, and AFTER all that I could worry about cancer again at the MRI on Tuesday. So instead of freaking about what's going to happen I should just enjoy all the days I have ahead of me and then face things head on when they happen. It's so easy to lose that perspective when you have all sorts of overwhelming things facing you, but that's when it's most important to maintain a day-at-a-time perspective. And that's what I'm going to continue to strive for.

I've decided something else, which is somewhat related to the day-at-a-time perspective. I am no longer going to waste my time. I am no longer going to reread my essays 10 times to make sure I don't miss a single comma splice, or attend a lecture on material that I know I've covered before. I am also not going to slack off and be lazy so that I waste my time catching up instead of learning. I am striving for balance. I am kissing my rhetoric lectures goodbye and just doing the readings & handing in the assignments on my own. I did it with three classes last term, so I know I can do it again. And I am going to stop being so anal about my essays and just do a good job of editing in one read-thru and be happy with a job well done. I need time to spend with my mom, my dad, my friends... I also need time for me. And that's what I'm striving for above all with this effort for balance.

So the tension is subsiding, as are my tears. But you can be sure that when I do need to cry, I'll ask for a shoulder.

So the good and the bad. Here goes.

I got my first co-op rejection. I fully expect to be rejected from a few of the jobs that I applied for, given that I have no marketing experience (due to the fact that I couldn't take the marketing position at IBM last term) and any local marketing position received upwards of 60 applications! But, I was actually excited to get rejected, because that means that employers are finally setting their interview lists. Hooray! I'm looking forward to interviews, tho I already feel a little overwhelmed by how busy it's going to make me. This time I only applied to 10 jobs, tho, so I don't expect more than a handful of interviews.

I successfully posted my first issue of the Imprint through my role as Web Editor! It was a little overwhelming to teach myself how to post the paper online with the added pressure that people were really anxious to have it up that day. Plus, there's a backlog of 5 issues of the paper that haven't been posted, which I will have to get up by this time next week. But you know what? It was satisfying. Click the link above. I did that! I made that happen! It feels good.

I am a bad friend. I was supposed to make an appearance at Ashly's house last night, but after my super-long day at Imprint (I was there working non-stop from 10am until 6pm) and then my night class, which ended at 9:30pm, I was too damned tired. I still haven't called her because I'm tired of being such a bad friend and having to apologize for it. I mean, Ashly knows that my life is hectic and she never faults me for it. But, I hate the fact that I haven't seen her since before she asked me to stand with her in her wedding. I shouldn't have to make such an effort to see someone that I love so much and that I consider one of my dearest friends. Gah! I only wish I could make it up to her somehow.

*****

Ok. Now for the big news. Mom's brain tumour is back with a vengence. Her original tumour was 5cm plus the swelling. Mom's new/regenerated tumour is now 4cm and still growing and swelling. FUCK!!! We found this all out on Tuesday when we took mom to the hospital because she was acting funny again.

So I'm all fucked up again. I've been hiding in Waterloo since we found this out. I already had plans to sleep here on Wednesday so I could have some beer with the hockey game. But I stayed here again last night partly because I was tired after my long day, but also so I didn't have to go home. I'm just so tired of this cancer thing. And now that mom's cancer is back in our faces, I am once again faced with the idea that my mom may die.

I wish I still hated my mom. I went thru a few years where I really did hate her. She and I had a horrible relationship for a while and she made some serious mistakes as a parent and a person. But even before this cancer thing I had forgiven her for all that. And while our relationship still isn't perfect (we're still very different people) I love her now more than I have in a long, long time. And now that I love her and now that my family is back together and enjoying life, we get this thrown at us. I guess I got over-confident again. I just assumed that since they were doing chemo mom would be able to beat this. But the chemo doesn't fucking work and now we're running dangerously short on options. Mom is getting surgery within the next few weeks, but that's not a guarantee that the cancer will be totally removed or that it won't come back again. And mom might not be able to do any more chemo.

What the fuck am I supposed to do now??? Answer me that. This disease has been ruling my life since March and I thought I could finally have my life back. But that's not the case. It's about to get really hard again. And I really don't know if I can handle it anymore. There's been a serious tension building up in me lately and I don't know how to deal. I try to keep positive, but I don't know how to continue doing that. Besides, it's being positive that leads me to be overconfident which leads to these horrible fucking let-downs when things go wrong.

I wish my biggest problem was that I was in a fight with someone or that school was hard. But it's not. So how the fuck am I gonna get through this one?

So here's the basic rundown of my weekend.

On Friday I spent the day at home, sleeping in (until the late hour of 9:30am) and then not doing homework. I really didn't have all that much to get done, but I probably could've put in a little bit of time. Ah well. Instead of homework, I checked out the EinsteinFest website. I really wish I would've hopped on this sooner! There are several lectures that I would've liked to see, but are now sold out. Ah well. I'll have to pay more attention next time PI puts on an event like this. I did, however, find something that wasn't sold out and that I am really excited about seeing: a Buster Keaton Matinee!!! Buck 65 mentions them quite a bit in some of his songs and during his live performances, and I know I love silent film, so it seemed like a neat event. Plus (here's the cool-factor) the soundtrack is going to be performed LIVE!!! Yuppers. I have heard of this technique before, most notably was an event advertising a viewing of the Rocky Horror Picture show with live soundtrack, and it intrigued me. And I knew Ryan would be into it, so I decided to go and get tickets. I headed over to his place before the PI boxoffice opened to tell him of my plan... Ha! He had been doing an all-night coding bender, and was sleeping when I arrived. I walked into his room, said hello and gave him a kiss on the cheek to wake him up... And he GRUNTED and PULLED THE BLANKETS OVER HIS HEAD!!! I nearly wet my pants from laughing!!! I took his primal communicative methods as a sign that he was DEFINITELY into the plan, so I headed over to PI and go the tickets. (Incidentally, there are some left if anyone wants to join us next Monday at 3pm!) When I told Ryan about it later, he was really into the matinee idea but claimed he didn't remember grunting at me.

After getting my tickets I went over to Victoria's place for some cookies, muffins and cards with her and Steph. I love my girls. Even if it's just a short visit, it's well worth it. It sucks that our schedules are so wonky this term, tho. It makes it difficult to spend time together. Well, at least we'll all be around next term!

While I was finishing up a game of cards with the girls, Megs called me. I was supposed to pick her up at the airport at 8:20pm that evening to head into Toronto for her boy's birthday celebrations. Turns out she was able to switch to an earlier flight and was calling to ask if I could be at the airport by 7pm. Her timing was perfect. It was 5pm, which gave me just enough time to rouste Ryan, fill up my tank, get some cash, and hit the highway. Traffic sucked until we got out of Kitchener, but it was smooth sailing all the way to Pearson. We got to the airport just in time to meet Megs at the loading area on our second pass around Airport Road. It's so awesome to NOT pay for parking!!! (Originally I was banking on having to pay for parking and track Megs down inside the terminal. Luckily Ryan came up with the idea of taking some laps around the road.)

Our night in Toronto was great fun. We parked my car and then headed out for dumplings at a little hole-in-the-wall around the corner from Kev's place. We each ordered one 12-piece plate of dumplings and most people shared. (Not eating red meat meant that I couldn't try anyone else's dumplings, but they were all good about not taking all the dumplings from my order. Thanks guys!) In addition to what we ordered, the server offered us free appetizers to try, and gave us a plate of dumplings for free because they'd made the wrong thing for another customer. In addition, we got free congee, which is essentially oatmeal but made from rice. So, it's rice-meal. The conversation was great - the exception being some revealing anecdotes shared by Alex that we all could've done without :oP - and the food was pretty damned good! In the end, the 8 of us were pretty stuffed, but we only paid a total of $32 for the whole meal!!! (The bill came to $21, but we tipped by about 50% given the incredibly generosity!)

Beers were had by all once we got back to Kevin's place. We played Fluxx, which was surprisingly not endrunkening, likely because there were too many people playing and the pace was too slow due to a large number of n00bs. Still fun, tho. Cards were also played, and we had fun with digital cameras, what with Kev's Mexican Matrix impressions and the little early-90s dance party we got going thanks to Steph's musical stylings.

Sleep was had and then we were up early to head to London. Megs and Kev were scheduled to attend her grandma's 90th birthday party, so I offered to drive her in exchange for gas money. Lexx jumped in with us and it became a road trip. And, like all good roadtrips, it started with major traffic issues. I ask you - is it even LEGAL to close the Gardiner??? Once we got going we were able to find a Burger King and enjoyed a feast of greasy breakfast and lunch food whilst travelling at 140kph down the McDonald-Cartier Expressway. I would like to note that I was able to eat an egg croisantwich AND dip my french toast sticks in syrup WHILE DRIVING and WITHOUT dripping on myself!!! Thank you, thank you. I'll wait for the applause to die down before I continue my post.

*** 15 minutes and several pounds of longstem roses falling at my feet later... ***

You're too kind. Thank you!

Saturday was a mellow kind of day. The drive took up quite a lot of time. We chilled for a few minutes in Megs' living room - which is the coolest living room EVER!!! She has the PERFECT leather seating and TV! I am immensely jealous!!! After dropping Kev and Megs at their event, Ryan and I introduced Lexx to our style of navigation. "Hey Lexx, we eventually need to turn left. You tell us when." He apparently didn't get it, because he first told us to check a MAP (silly boy) and then instructed us to turn left into a field. Ah well. He'll learn eventually. Unfortunately the 401 beat us in this latest round. Rather than meandering around it, be ended up bumping right into it and had to hop on it just outside Kitchener. We'll get you next time, you urban transportation hellian!!!

The afternoon involved a nice, long nap, and then dinner. We eventually made our way over to Lexx's place for his Extended RIMjob celebration event. His 4-month co-op was just extended to an 8-month, so we all drank his alcohol in celebration. Settler's was played, politics were discussed with gusto, and Co and I eventually fell asleep. Our boys were gracious enough to wake us and lead us home to consume popcorn and eventually hit the sack for the night.

On Sunday I rolled out of Ryan's bed nice and early and headed home. Upon arrival, I was greeted by a father with a stomach bug. Yicky. He didn't let his illness stand in the way of getting me to scrap the paint off the outside window casements and then help him fix a major plumbing issue. Actually, I didn't mind the chores. It was a nice day to be outside, and I quite like my basement and don't want it to look like New Orleans thanks to this damned leaky pipe, so I can't complain too much about the home repairs.

The rest of my day was occupied by homework. Specificially, I designed a website to host an article that I wrote for my Info Design class. It's not due until Thursday, but I wanted to get it underway because I know how absorbed I get when it comes to webdesign and tech writing - and the assingment involves both! I ended up working on it until 3am, and I plan to refine it some more over the next few days.

This brings me to today. I am currently in the basement of the Dana Porter library, sitting at a laptop station and avoiding the reading I have to do for Rhetoric class tomorrow. Boo Rhetoric class. I'm basically killing time until I attend a seminar put on by Mike Lazaridis himself! I'm going for the BlackBerry draw (There are two draws for a free BlackBerry with full email service for a year!) but I'm staying to hear what this crazy genius dude has to say. Should be interesting.

This evening finds me spending a little time with Ryan and then heading to Guelph for yoga with Vanessa.

Have I mentioned lately that life is good??? :o)

Taken from my MSN convo with Kev, cuz I had to tell someone right away who'd appreciate this experience:

ok. so someone named Steph sent me a message on MSN
So I started chatting with Steph and talking about how I had an amazing day, and felt really loved, and felt the happiest that I've been since before my mom got sick.
So, a very revealing conversation, right?
THEN - I realized it wasn't the Steph I thought it was.....
It was A GUY... FROM FRANCE.... WHO I JUST MET.... WHO I'M DOING A GROUP PROJECT WITH.!!!!!
so, here's the issue
i basically just bonded with someone - UNINTENTIONALLY!!!!



So here's the thing. Steph's a nice enough guy, and working on a group project with him and another guy means that we'll have to get along. But this is WEIRD!!! I thought it was my friend Steph who lives in Calgary right now for co-op!!!!!! This was girl talk, OBVIOUSLY!!!! Gah. But, I think most of it flew over this guy's head because his English is still not great. I mean, his English is better than most ppl's French, but he still has a lot of trouble understanding the nuances of the language.

Anyways. The moral of the story: Check the email address of the person who's messaging you BEFORE you start spouting off!!!

Moral #2: Get an IM program that allows you to make a custom name for a person to ensure that you avoid these strange things.

Q: Why did the co-op student cross the road?
A: To get a co-op job at RIM!

So I went to the RIM info session today. I got there about 10 minutes late, so I didn't get a seat or pizza. I heard all about what they do, including seeing a bunch of fellow potential-co-ops acting out how the RIM network operates. They all got pens and a couple people got a hat! Oh! How I love swag! That's actually when I noticed that a lot of people had a little box with a thermal mug in it... FREE MUGS!! I didn't get a seat, but I was quick to grab one of the mugs off an unoccupied seat as people left! So now I have a new mug! :oD

As I went back to my car after the info session (new mug in hand!) I bumped into my friend Alyssa. She works for RIM as a tech writer. She started as a co-op in 2nd year, came back last term, and now is working part time while she goes to school, and then she'll be returning as a co-op next term. Why the extensive work history of my friend? Because she's working on getting me a job there!!! She's been telling her manager about my STC involvement and my eagerness to work at RIM! Hopefully that will help me get filtered thru the RIM system and into an interview with the ultimate of co-op employers!!!

*****

In other news, I had a great weekend. It started with a bonfire at Adam's house. Music was selected and cued up in the CD player, a fire was (eventually, after much effort from both Adam and Ryan) lit, and marshmallows were eaten (eventually, after much nagging by Steph). We even played a game of Settler's and - no surprise whatsoever - everyone enjoyed the game! Ryan had fun bringing out my competative side by helping everyone to strategize against me. I was getting pissed because I hate to lose, but it was a good kinda pissed that gave me some adrenaline and made the game that much more fun. I love the fact that he knows how to get me all hopped up in a good way. I mean, he doesn't genuinely get me pissed off. But, he does know how to play off my personality quirks. And he knows how far to take it. What can I say? I love to be challenged and blow off a little steam.

Have I mentioned how much I love my friends? I laugh SO HARD every time I'm with them! And even tho it's been a while since we've gotten together (about 2 months) it's always like old times!

Saturday was tons of fun, too. Ryan, J, Co and I started a game of Settlers then got all dressed up to go out. We all went to see the Corpse Bride at Galaxy, which was really entertaining. I love Tim Burton movies! His attention to detail and the fullness of every frame is so captivating! I tried not to blink! After the movie we went out for a fancy dinner - on me! (That is why we got all dressed up!) I won a $100 gift certificate at the Sybase Xmas party last December, so I invited them out to enjoy it with me. It turned out to be a really nice experience. The restaurant, Solé, is a Mediterranian Wine Bar and Restaurant. The waitresses seemed disappointed that none of us chose to drink wine, but we all induldged in awesome meals. J, Ryan and I shared an appetizer of hummus, black olive dip, and guacamole with grilled pita bread. Then I had a meal of potatoe gnocci with banana, crushed cashews, and an apricot and oat crust. Yup. It was weird. But it was really delicious! And it seemed to be the most adventurous thing on the menu, so I dove right in! The waitress really pressed for us to have dessert. I showed a little inkling of wanting to take something home and she practically forced the menu on me! I didn't cave because I knew I had a large bottle of wine and an in-progress game of Settlers waiting for me at Ryan's place. We all got a little inebriated and enjoyed Settlers, some Virtua Tennis, then another game of Settlers. It was a great night!!

The next day I rolled out of Ryan's bed and dragged myself home to do homework. Ugh. Who knew it would be so hard to figure out how rhetoric is used in Hamlet. Gah. Oh well, thats done.

Okey doke. I'm about to watch Part 1 of a PBS special on Bob Dylan. I might post on it afterwards if it's as intriguing as my Dad and I hope it's going to be.

In breif school has started, life is getting back to normal, and all is well on the home front.

I like my classes. Lemme tell you a little bit about them...

Monday and Wednesday from 10:30 to noon I have DAC 300. It's basically a Journalism course, with a focus on how journalism is being executed and thwarted online. Since I've recently gotten into blogging and reading blogs of all sorts, this course should be pretty interesting. The instructor works at The Record, the Kitchener newspaper, so there is some blatent promotion of his paper, but it means we don't have to buy a textbook, so I'm all for it!!!

Tuesday and Thursday from 1 until 2:20pm I have English 309c, which is one of my required rhetoric theory courses. And speaking of not buying textbooks - I am reusing my text book from English 292, because all the readings are the same!!! On the one hand, I save about $90 by not buying the book for this course. On the other hand, it means I'm paying to relearn material that was already fully covered in the previous course! There are a handful of new readings in this course, but otherwise it seems almost identical to the previous class. Ah well. I've decided to not care too much. It just means I can focus more on my other classes.

Tuesday nights from 6 to 9pm I have English 392a, Information Design. I still haven't attended, because I'm a dumbass. See, I thought the class started at 6:30pm, so I rolled onto campus and got to the classroom by 6:31 (yeah, I was late - I needed to buy tea to help with my sore throat, but more about that later...) and nobody was there. I rechecked my schedule online, realized I'm a dumbass, but assumed that the class was cut short and that I hadn't missed much. Pfft! Yeah right! It turns out the prof moved us over to the FlexLab (more about that lab later, too) and did a full class. Damn. Luckily, my friend Adam (finacé to Ashly and father of their super-cute daughter!) is in the class and will be able to fill me in on what I missed. Still - not a great way to start. Ah well.

Wednesday nights from 6:30 to 9:30pm I have English 315, Modern Canadian Lit. I'm quickly discovering that while I'm not big on lit courses, I usually end up enjoying them in the end. I still haven't had a lit class stand out as a favourite course during my university career, but I have always come away with a good mark and enjoyed at least a few of the readings. This should be no exception. I'm reading Emily's Quest (part of Lucy Maude Montgomery's Emily of New Moon series) and enjoying it quite a bit. It's taking a lot longer to read than I expected, so I'm glad I had all of today to start tackling it. One great thing about the class - the lectures only run from 6:30 until about 8pm or so and then most of the class is dismissed. I say most of the class because we have to sign up for two lectures where we stay behind to discuss the works in more detail and hand in a short assignment for a total of 20% of our mark. I signed up for next week's discussion group to get one out of the way early, so I'm glad I've given myself plenty of time to read the book!

Thursday nights I have Arts 303, Multimedia Learning Activities. This is probably going to be among my favourite courses of all time. Basically, we get to design a Distance Ed course for the school, with the chance to get paid to implement it! Along the way we're going to learn more about how people learn and how technology can be used to bring out the most in a person's learning style. The course is entirely based on groupwork, which normally eeks me out due to horrible, awful prior experiences. However, everyone in this course genuinely wants to be there, so I can't forsee anyone being an ass and slacking off too much. The best part is that we get to use the FlexLab for this course, too!

Ok. Let's talk about the FlexLab. Can you say 20 tablet PCs? Wireless internet connection? Lots of awesome software? Chillers? (The latter is a super-powered air conditioner that the prof can switch on if he wants us to wake up and pay attention! I just mentioned it because it's so freakin' bizarre!) But this classroom is amazingly well-stocked. Actually, that's the point. Theres some campus group that funds this room so that it has all sorts of new technology so that profs and a few elite students (i.e. my class!!!) can test them and see how they funtion in an educational setting. Having two classes in that room should be pretty awesome!

Ok. Now about this sore throat. All summer I've had bouts where I felt a cold coming on. I blame stress and fatigue. Well, I finally caught that cold while camping. Couple that with some mad-bad-dangerous-to-know (gotta love Blake references) allergies and you have a miserable Sarah. Luckily I was too distracted by moving and being incredibly happy to be home to wallow in my illness. Still, the illness decided it didn't like to be ignored and instead of going quietly, it settled in my sinuses. My sore throat kept getting worse, I started having trouble breathing, and I decided to call Health Services. The doc calls it Sinusitis, which basically means enflamed sinuses. I know have a puffer, antibiotics, and (wait for it... wait for it...) Nasal Spray!!! Yes folks, if there was any doubt before there can be no doubt now - I must be a nerd if I have Nasal Spray! I got these meds yesterday, Dad made me stay home today to recoup, and what do ya know - I feel MUCH better!

Oh, what about missing a day of school, you ask? Note the above schedule - I have NO CLASSES ON FRIDAYS!!! Oh, life is good when you're in Arts!!!